It’s amazing how many women often find themselves caught in the unfortunate position known as the ‘Friend Zone.’ The ‘Friend Zone’ is the uncomfortable position that causes you to become temporarily suspended between the platonic origin of friendship and the desired, blissful destination of intimate relationship. Unfortunately, all women ARE susceptible to this position or state of being. The ‘Friend Zone’ does not discriminate based on looks, financial status, spiritual maturity or intelligence.
As a woman, you are guilty of nothing more than allowing the wiring of your innate desire to read into signs that may or may not be true indicators of the interest level a man has for you. What are some of the signs to look for in order to assess whether or not you fall into this category? Consider these…
• You have established a great friendship, have grown to learn so much about his personal life, you find him attractive, but things have been this way for months…maybe years!
• You talk to him regularly and the pattern of communication resembles that of two people in a relationship.
• You find yourself reaching out to him when exciting things happen in your life, but his reaction never confirms anything other than platonic or brotherly joy for you.
• You are someone he feels comfortable going to for advice about various areas of his life, but he never includes you outside of a consultative role.
• You serve as a sounding board for the successes and/or challenges he experiences in his other relationships.
• You have had outings (e.g. lunch, dinner, coffee) with him, but there is never a clearly defined romantic or intimate ‘feel’ to them.
• You are often introduced to others in a way that is difficult to interpret (“This is my girl (said in the sister-like tone)!” “This is someone very close to me”, etc.)
• You seem to never have a settled feeling on where your relationship stands with him.
The above list highlights some signs that indicate your candidacy for the ‘Friend Zone.’ A man may never be forthcoming about his feelings towards you even though he fully understands that you may have an interest in him. Many men are willing to accept what you offer them and may choose the cowardly option of NOT addressing the situation as long as you don’t bring it up. Because he has not made a direct signal to you, he feels no obligation to clarify the situation.
Also, if a man never makes a direct move at trying to spend time with you, it is an indicator that he does not have an intimate level of feelings for you. Once he becomes proactive at initiating opportunities to spend time with you, you can then begin processing his intentions for your friendship/relationship.
Don’t make the mistake of reading too much into a friendship because more often than not it will result in disappointment. When you absolutely have to have an answer to the question that’s burning deep inside of you JUST ASK HIM! However, be prepared for the disappointing answer you are likely to receive. No…he’s not too shy! No…he’s not in denial! No he’s not gay (well maybe)! The reality is he’s just not that into you!
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